📧 DAY 4 – How to Handle Conflict With Your Junior

If emotions keep clashing on the course pause the cycle and reset the relationship.

If you and your child are constantly arguing during practice or tournaments, you’re not alone. Golf is emotional. When expectations build, emotions run high and the relationship can quietly shift from connection to conflict.

That’s your sign to stop repeating the pattern and try something different:

Sit down, outside of golf, and ask:
“What do you really need from me when we’re at practice or during a round?”

But here’s the hard part you have to be ready to accept their answer without defending yourself.
That’s how trust is built.

They might say things like:

• “I just want you to watch, not coach.”

• “It’s hard when you get upset after my bad shots.”

• “Please don’t give me tips. I already feel bad enough.”

• “I need you to be there but not react.”

These answers are not criticism. They are boundaries.
If your child feels safe enough to tell you the truth and you can honor it without taking it personally you’ve just opened the door to a better, healthier dynamic.

And if you realize you can’t be calm or neutral…

You may need to step back from being present at tournaments or practices for a while.
That’s not failure. That’s being the adult.
Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is give them space to grow without emotional pressure.

Key Insight:

Trust is built when your child knows they can tell you the truth and that your love doesn’t change, no matter what they say or shoot.

Reflection:

When was the last time you asked your junior golfer what they truly need from you during golf?
How did you respond and what could you do differently next time?

My personal experience:

Before I found golf, I was very invested in tennis.
After school, I went straight to the academy and practiced three hours a day, every day of the week. I loved it. It was intense, but I’ve always loved being an athlete.

Competitions were every Saturday and Sunday. My parents took turns taking me. When my dad came, I struggled to focus, he had a hard time sitting still. I’d look back between points and sometimes he wasn’t there anymore. It made me anxious and distracted. One day, I told him: “If you can’t sit still for the whole match, I’d rather you didn’t come.”

My mom, on the other hand, came to every match. She barely moved. She didn’t flinch when things went wrong. That didn’t make her a better parent, it just meant she was able to be the calm, steady presence I needed in those moments.

My dad and I continue to have a great relationship and he’s the one that got me into golf.

If your junior is playing a sport, it’s for them not for you. Whatever they need from you emotionally, try your best to give it. And if you find you can’t… stepping back might actually be the most supportive thing you can do.

Disclaimer:
This story reflects my personal experience and perspective as both an athlete and a coach. Every child and family dynamic is different. The intention is not to judge, but to encourage awareness, reflection, and growth. I always recommend that parents keep learning, listening, and adjusting to support their junior athletes in the way that works best for them.

See you tomorrow!